A blanket of white covered the neighborhood, courtesy of the first snowfall of winter.  The sky was just beginning to lighten, dawn steadily making her way beneath the horizon.  Tired, red-rimmed eyes peered out into the darkness, waiting for the first sign of life.  A circle of fog rhythmically spread and faded as the old woman, her forehead pressed against the cold pane of the window in her second-story bedroom, breathed in and out.  Her white hair, once thick and a gorgeous chestnut color, had thinned to the point where her skull was readily apparent.  What was once a voluptuous, flawless beauty was now a thin, wrinkled and sagging creature.

 

She stared off into the distance, not looking at the fresh carpet of snow, but seeing images from her past.  She had always been proud and independent, and more than a touch stubborn, and that much had remained the same.  Yellowed eyes flicked to the large digital readout emblazoning the current time onto her wall, and she sighed as she realized she still had at least an hour before the house would begin to stir.  With nothing else to occupy her thoughts, she returned to her inner scrutiny of her life.  She had a daughter, Paprika, that she loved more than life, and who had brought her much joy over the years.  Her house had been paid for decades earlier, and there was the escrow account which paid for all living expenses.  She had her family, her friends, her faith, a roof over her head, and had led a fairly prosperous life.  Still, there was a bitter, cold core at the center of her heart that time had not eased in the least.

 

A sudden movement in the darkness below shook her out of her reflections.  She strained her eyes, staring down the street, trying to detect what had caught her attention.  At the very end of the block a figure slowly moved into view, and the air grew heavy around her.  It was clothed in a black, hooded cloak that covered from head to toe, making it impossible to even guess whether the person was male or female.  The figure was walking in a direction that would lead them directly in front of her window, and she leaned closer trying to discern some clue as to the cloak-wearer’s identity.  As the figure neared her house, the woman jumped back as the window she had been leaning against was suddenly covered by a sheet of ice.  The old woman swept at the ice with her afghan, and when that didn’t work scraped at it with her fingernails.  By the time she had cleared a section large enough to see through, the figure had disappeared.

 

Then she heard the front door of the house creak open.  An ocean of fear washed over her as her breath was sucked from her chest, not even leaving enough wind to call out.  The carpeting in the hall softened the sound of the footsteps approaching her room at the top of the stairs but did not silence them completely.  Her eyes doubled in size as her bedroom door slowly swung open, and the figure in black glided into the room.  She sat, frozen in fear, as it came to a stop a few feet away.  Black-gloved hands appeared and swept up to remove the hood of the cloak.  Time seemed to stand still.  Where she had not had any breath at all moments earlier, she now found herself taking in too much air, as she began to hyperventilate.

 

The gloved hands swept back the hood, revealing a woman of unearthly beauty.  Waves of silver hair flowed down her back, reaching for the ground.  Skin the color of moonlight glowed around blue eyes deep enough to drown in.  Pearly white teeth gleamed in the darkness as the woman’s face softened into a smile, and the old lady’s fear had vanished before the smile was complete.

 

“Hello Avalon, it’s a pleasure to finally meet you.  Would it be all right if I called you Ava?  That is what your friends call you, and we will be great friends, you and I.”

 

The words had drifted through the air, like dust motes in sunlight, and Ava found herself nodding to the vision without even thinking.

 

“Well then Ava, that makes things much more comfortable, shall we sit down?  We have much to discuss and you have little strength left.”

 

Ava collapsed back into the chair she had been occupying for the last few hours, and the stranger glided over and perched on the end of Ava’s bed.

 

Finally regaining at least a hint of her wits, Ava managed to ask three questions at once, without even forming a sentence, “Who . . .what . . . why are you . . .”

 

The woman grinned, revealing dimples that further softened her face.  “Let’s start with who, since that is the quickest to answer.  Your race has many names for me, but you may call me Geocor.”

 

Ava buried her head in her hands.  Her muffled voice came from between clenched fists.  “It’s my time to die, isn’t it?  That’s what you are – you’ve come to take me . . .” Nothing else could be understood as Ava broke into sobs that wracked her entire body.

 

Geocor was beside Ava in a heartbeat.  She stood beside the chair and pulled the shaking woman into an embrace, whispering into her ear.  “Shh, there now . . . Ava, calm yourself, please.  This is not your moment of death.  I am here to offer you an extraordinary opportunity.”

 

Ava peered through her clenched fingers; hope lit her eyes from within dampened by disbelief and skepticism.  “I’m not dead?”

 

Geocor held out her hands and, after a moment’s hesitation, Ava took them and allowed herself to be pulled out of her chair.  Geocor led Ava by the hand to her vanity, and together they stared into the large, ornate mirror there.  For a fleeting moment, the image staring back at Ava was herself, in her thirties, still full of dreams and hope, eyes filled with an unending curiosity and love of life.  The image blurred and when it came back into focus it showed Ava, beaten down by the passage of time.  Her eyes, though still filled with curiosity, had lost their love of life somewhere along the way.  Those curious eyes turned to the pale vision beside her, “You said something about an opportunity?”

 

Geocor’s eyes shown with delight, “You were always so strong in spirit, Ava.  I’m glad to see that hasn’t changed.  Yes, I am here to offer you an opportunity.  For many years I have watched you, and my heart has ached for you.  It has always been clear how much you love your family and friends.  You have a kind heart, but it is also a closed heart, for you shut down a piece of yourself many moons ago.”

 

Ava’s eyes glistened with tears as Geocor continued.  “I am here to give you a choice, a chance to rewrite your life.  I have limited powers, but power enough to send you back in time and give you the chance to change one major event, or decision if you will.”

 

Ava, her knees feeling quite weak again suddenly, walked in a daze back to her chair by the window.  Collapsing into it, she stared out the window in a trance, everything else forgotten, as her mind traveled back in time to the one event that changed her life forever.

 

She was thirty years old and completely at peace with her life, except for the fact that she had been told she would never have children.  She found pleasures in the simple things, curling up on the couch and reading a good book, or sitting in front of the fireplace on cold days sipping her coffee.  Anything that she could do at home she lived for, she was a homebody and was never more content than when she was puttering around the house.  One night her friends had surprised her by showing up on her doorstep and informing her, with a stubbornness to match her own, that she would be going out with them tonight and they were not taking no for an answer.  Caving in to the inevitable, she had felt a thrill of excitement as they helped her pick out an outfit, and within an hour they were headed for the club.

 

Her friends went out quite often and had enough friends that worked the door and the bars spread throughout the club that getting in was no problem and every other drink was free.  She had paced herself, knowing full well that she couldn’t handle much alcohol because she had built up no tolerance for it.  The girls moved in a pack from area to area, for this club had 5 “mini-bars” inside and offered everything from Techno to Country to Karaoke, dancing here and there but mainly staying together and having a great time.

 

Then she had spotted him, walking right towards her.  He was tall, 6’1″, with midnight-black hair, forest-green eyes, and lips slightly chapped from a nervous habit of licking them, yet still immensely kissable.  He had walked up to her at the bar, introduced himself as Hayden, and shyly asked her to dance.  They had danced all night long, and Ava found herself closing the bar down for the first time in years.  When the lights came on at 2 a.m., Hayden had asked her if she would accompany him to breakfast, and not wanting the night to end, she had agreed as long as her friends could come too (safety was always an issue).  After breakfast they stood in the parking lot and talked until the sun came up.  They were inseparable from that point on.

 

Within a year, Ava discovered she was pregnant, and Hayden seemed as happy about this as she was.  They got a house together and began planning for a life together with a child.  And that was where things went wrong.  The pregnancy was a very difficult one, and 5 months into it Hayden seemed to be gone all the time, leaving her alone to deal with the nausea, decorating, and other duties.  He traveled with his job and seemed to be gone more often each month.  Finally, it came to a head two days before Christmas, with Ava six months pregnant.

 

Hayden’s twenty-two-year-old girlfriend called the house to inform Ava that Hayden would not be returning home and asked Ava to pack all his things up so that they could pick them up in the next week.

 

Ava remembered the absolute devastation to this day, of waddling into the kitchen and trying to pour a glass of water.  With tears pouring down her face, hands shaking so violently that the glass slipped from her fingers.  As the glass hit the floor and shattered into a million pieces, so had her heart.  Within hours she had packed every bit of his clothing and placed it beside the house for them to pick up.  She then sat down to figure out how she was going to make it with a child, on her own.

 

She called her mother, who came over immediately trying hard to hide her absolute hatred for this man who had done this horrible thing to her daughter and grandchild.  Between them they decided to move into a house together so that Ava would have a support system in place and her mother would be able to spend unlimited time with her one, and only, grandchild.  Paprika was born, a healthy and beautiful baby girl, and that was the last time her father saw her.  He never came around again.

 

Over the years Ava would hear from friends how he had cheated on the latest conquest, and already moved in with the new woman.  Each time Ava’s heart would grow a little colder.  She had never dated again; never let a man get close to her heart.  Instead, she had concentrated all her love and energy on her family and friends.

 

Geocor cleared her throat, bringing Ava out of the past and back to the present.  “Have you made up your mind what you will do, Ava?”

 

Ava, on impulse, jumped out of the chair and strode across the floor to Geocor.  “Yes, I have.  I know what moment I would like to go back to and change.”

 

Geocor reached down and held both hands, turning them both back towards the mirror.  “Okay, Ava, I need you to close your eyes and concentrate on the moment you want to return to.”

 

Ava closed her eyes and concentrated so hard that furrows appeared above her eyes.  Geocor began chanting in a strange, fluid language.  In the distance a rhythmic drumming began, growing in sound until Ava couldn’t even hear her heartbeat anymore.  The drums became so loud that Ava felt her teeth shaking with each beat, and her heart was now beating in time to the rhythm.

 

Suddenly a hand grabbed her shoulder and Ava screamed and flung open her eyes.  Her friend jumped about a foot off the floor, “Good Lord Ava, are you okay?  You’ve been gone so long I came to check on you.  You were just standing in front of the mirror with your eyes closed, and now you look as if you’ve seen a ghost!”

 

Ava looked into the mirror, taking in her dark hair and minimal wrinkles.  The drums were still pounding away, and Ava realized it was the bass from the music being played in the club.  Her friend was still looking at her with concern, so Ava flashed one of her ready smiles and headed back out into the club.  She positioned herself at the bar, knowing in a few minutes Hayden would be approaching her.

 

Sure enough, there he came.  God, she had forgotten how handsome he truly was.  With each step he took, Ava’s mind flashed through the years ahead, reliving every moment in exquisite detail.  Finally, there he was.  Her heart was beating so loudly she could hear it over the music as he shyly smiled down at her.

 

“Hi, my name is Hayden.  Would you . . . is it possible . . . will you dance with me?”

 

An eternity passed in a second as Ava stared up at Hayden, until she gave her answer, “Hello Hayden.  My name is Avalon, but you can call me Ava.  And yes, I’d love to dance with you.”

 

Suddenly time stopped, everyone froze in place but Ava, and silence descended across the room.  Geocor popped into view a few feet away, and it was obvious she was agitated.

 

“What are you doing, Ava?!?  I thought you came back to change things.  Are you really going to let this man . . . “ Her face shriveled up in distaste at the word, and she glared at the stationary figure as she continued, “. . . this man break your heart all over again?”  Geocor’s tirade continued for a few more minutes before she started to calm down.  Finally, looking exhausted, drained, and completely bewildered, Geocor looked into Ava’s strong face and simply said, “Why?”

 

Ava’s eyes welled up with tears, but a broad smile split her face.  “I can answer your question with one word . . . Paprika!”  Geocor was about to break in, but Ava silenced her with a gesture.  “Please hear me out.  I have no intention of squandering the chance you have given me.”  Geocor’s mouth was working furiously, but no sound came out as Ava continued, “You say you’ve watched over me for years, but you evidently do not know me.  Although, at first, my intention was to tell Hayden to take a flying leap, by doing so I would lose my daughter.  Also, I have no idea how else it might change my life – better or worse?  Regardless, there is one thing I know for certain, changing the course of your life by changing a milestone event is inherently dangerous.  I do plan on making some changes this time around, but they will be personal changes.”

 

Geocor’s mouth stopped moving, and her head cocked a little to the side.  “Personal changes?”

 

“Yes, personal changes.  I can’t change the fact that I fall in love with Hayden and have Paprika, because it’s an integral part of who I am.”  Ava stepped closer to Geocor, earnestly trying to put her thoughts and feelings into words this unearthly creature could understand.

 

“What I can change is my reaction to it.  Instead of locking down my heart and being so afraid of getting hurt again that I don’t allow myself to love, I will be open and receptive to the idea that there is a man out there worthy of my attention.  I may not find him, and I will probably not actively look for him, but I will not turn him away if he appears.   I don’t know how else to say it . . . ”

 

Geocor’s eyes shimmered with unshed tears as she stared into the face of this proud, stubborn, bewildering human.  She couldn’t help but admire Ava and realized her view of humans in general had been profoundly changed by this encounter.

 

“Ava, while I do not completely understand what you’re saying, I will leave you in peace to change what you will.”

 

Ava returned to Hayden’s side as Geocor faded and the last thing she heard her say was, “I’ll be watching . . .” before the music roared back into existence and Hayden took her hand.

 

 

* * *

 

Ava woke in the middle of the night, unsure what had roused her.  She got out of bed, draped on her housecoat, and padded across the room to her favorite chair by the window.  She realized that winter had made itself known as she stared out at the first snowfall of the season.   The blanket of white was oddly comforting, and she found herself pressing her forehead against the window, eyes swallowing in the scene before her.

 

A sound behind her caused her to start, and then she laughed at herself for being so silly when the second snore came.  You’re getting old, old girl, she thought to herself as she walked over to look lovingly down at her husband.  She still couldn’t believe how lucky she was, for not only had this man given her thirty years of unending love, he had also adopted her daughter, Paprika, giving her the father she would never have known otherwise.

 

She leaned over and kissed him gently, whispering, “Thank you, my love, for being the man I didn’t think existed.”  She shed her housecoat and crawled back into bed.  He rolled over and wrapped his arms around her as she drifted back to sleep with a smile on her face.